The Humanoid

August 08, 11

The hipless woman in the glow of creation is offered up by metallic arms from the mechanical ovum encasement complete with a form guidance rebar system.

An outline of daggers.

Two shaded observers watch the moment of transaction with The Humanoid arching the spine in combat tested confidence.  Era required feathered hair flows forward in the celestial aura of frozen static cling.

A wrist bracelet attached to a subwoofer binds tomorrow’s Eve, while feet glow so brightly that all physiology is lost.  Guards protect piled pancake housing units.  The robo-bulldog waits.

The Serpent’s Clutch

August 05, 11

The greed of sneaking deep into the aquamarine only to loot another’s treasure haul, is paid for with asphyxiation in the clutches of a Serpent.

Our blue diver has paid the price by questioning the morality of the infinite depths.

His mask popped off like a Pez dispenser delivering the goods.

The Serpent glares at the yellow diver, who looks on with concern at the fate of his dispatched partner in crime. A powerful speargun will not remedy the situation, and his loot will wait to ever see the surface.

Popped off masks and a full bag of loot will soon reach the sandy bottom.

Panic bubbles rise as evidence.

Brain Boy

August 01, 11

The General observes as Brain Boy swoops in carried both by air current and youthful confidence, destined for a mouth full of sand due to a poorly positioned landing ankle.

A legion of 500,000 robots comply with orders, and fire at the well dressed menace in the sky.

A lone motorcyclist observes the General at a distance, untouched by the snakeline robots.

Ordnance plumes ignite the day sky.

Laserblast

June 13, 11

From the poster illustration, it seems like Laserblast stars Paul Williams with a Tomy created rainbow laser vacuum mounted on his arm, but it doesn’t.

You have to love the stop motion efforts with the aliens, and this is just the kind of movie from 1978 that can easily use a re-imagined soundtrack, which is always fun.

Billy got pushed around, and then started fighting aliens with his discovered attachment.  He also appears to attack a helpless Mick Fleetwood in a van, with a beam which will dismantle him in the roadside gravel at some later moment.

A simple town girl tries to rescue Billy from cutting down everyone around him, but Billy refuses to listen.  The pushing around will have a hollow and noisy conclusion in bubbling clay.

Shoulder Monsters

June 03, 11

Merlin zaps an extra held over from Planet of the Apes.  He is knocked off balance onto one foot in the perfect robe.

Touchdown.

Just like a really bad boss or a stepmother caged in a house too small suffering tight shoes, the monster draws strength from the human he (or she)  is slowly killing.

We all carry the monster on our shoulders in the relay race at some point.

This one sports red swim trunks and displays a full set of teeth.

Play is the slayer of monsters.

Dr. Solar Mechano-Organic

May 22, 11

When the mechano-organic come together, it’s a beautiful thing.

Caught in the maw of the mechano-turtle, Dr. Solar fights to evade the reptilian tongue slinky.

A fiery mechano-bat swoops in while a mechano-ocotpus fires the pulse canon from eyeball sockets into the mechano-turtle’s jaw — just missing Dr. Solar.

Mechano-turtle reacts by flashing the high beams to the skies in an attempt to signal the mechan0-ant or the mechano-crab, snacking on carrion down by the grass huts (not pictured).

A desperate call for any available mechano.  Solar won’t be stopped. A tough day at the beach.

Invaders with Fish Bowl Helmets

May 22, 11

I love fish bowl or jam jar helmets, so this image gets immediate notice.

In a million ways, the sight of a cracked, shattered, popped or melted fish bowl helmet is the cherry.

Any glass, plastic or metal carapace encasing the enemy nerve station in battle is the perfect target.  Yes!  And check out the sniffer glands mounted over the invader eyeballs.  More perfection.  These things sniff out hostiles, before fading them out of existence.

The attack is fast, and our pilot of the stranded air blimp lilting on its side is soon made transparent without even a weapon to defend himself.

Demented clowns in fish bowl helmets make a daring attempt to steal the Earth.

The David Lee Roth Support Group

May 14, 11

In high school I tried to form a David Lee Roth support group. You know, sort of a twelve step group committed to the idea of wild-eyed positivity.

We would meet up around town, our Jack Daniels bottles filled with instant iced tea, and talk about any progress we might have made in our personal lives towards wild-eyed positivity.

Agenda: Was anyone learning to rock climb? Paddling canoes around Manhattan? Planning to hike across South America? Was one of us learning new dance moves integrating multiple katana swords? Ice fishing?

Very super usually, not.

We tried to build up our Rothist cred by assuring ourselves that high school was only a fixed point in time, that the future had to be much more Rothist than the present.

It had to be. It was our hope.

The hell of cafeteria food, moldy gym towels, acne that would not die, and life sapping buzzers mounted every 8 feet couldn’t last forever.

At some point we would be free, and we saw freedom as the center of the Rothist movement. In our testosterone infected minds, Roth was somehow free. Oh sure, he had his back up against the record machine, and later on, we would really begin to see what that could mean.

He too was telling us that he was trapped by the strictures of commerciality that limited his mighty expression of freedom. The freedom at the center of our Rothist ideology wasn’t real. The Roth in-concept was free, but maybe the real one wasn’t.

For instance, in 1983 he had to be flown back from excursions in the jungle in order to appear at the US Festival earning an amount of nutty money that put Van Halen into the Guinness Book of World Records. Then it seemed his back was up against the WORLD record machine.

Our support group eventually fizzled out when no one could finance much of anything towards our wild-eyed positivity hopes. We continued to split 75 cent burritos at Taco Bell and wait for the right moment to start another movement.

Welcome to Mysterious Island!

May 06, 11

Welcome to Mysterious Island.  Stranded on a live volcano, castaways battle incredible creatures for survival.

It was all caviar, cigars, horse racing and coconut drinks for the inhabitants of Mysterious Island.

Out on a simple research dive, one soon felt the squeezing grip of a Giant Octopus transforming this deep sea diver into a fathom’s deep doggie toy.

“For believe me! — the secret of realizing the greatest fruitfulness and the greatest enjoyment of existence is: to live dangerously!  Build your cities on the slopes of Vesuvius!  Send your ships out into uncharted seas!  Live in conflict with your equals and with yourselves!  Be robbers and ravagers as long as you cannot be rulers and owners, you men of knowledge!”
— Nietzsche

Hakuin

May 05, 11

I first discovered Hakuin in the late 1980’s at the Bowers Museum in Santa Ana, CA.

The power, simplicity, iconography and “rumination factor” attached to these amazing brush strokes were hard to resist.

An image makes a new friend.

This one, among several, burned quickly in my mind, and I found myself thinking for days about it, and coming back again over the years.

You can find yourself reading philosophy for decades, trying to sort through it all like a big messy box of keys, and then you see something that sets the meter true again inside of 45 line strokes.